He came to return me all my belongings. He sms-ed my sis to ask if my mum was at home before coming - did not tell me that he is coming at all. thank goodness i was at home to witness. he came with zisheng. i guess he took leave today as yesterday was our 1st yr anniversary and we had initially planned to have our holidays @ batam. since things happened, i tot he would have cancelled his applied leave, but he didnt. 3 bags of my belongings, mainly consists of my clothes, daily product, perfumes, even my shower and body form BUT HE DID NOT RETURN ME MY PASSPORT!!! i got damn angry and i called him when he is @ the living room and i was @ my room. i asked y he did not bring he claimed he had forgotten. he chatted with my mum and i dun even know wat r they talking abt. my mum came into my room crying and said i should have gone out to chat with him. WHY SHOULD I? she said i do not have the guts to face him! WTH?! not tat i do not dare to face him, its tat I DO NOT EVEN WANNA SEE HIS FACE!!! i hate him to the core when he just cancelled my sub-card without informing me and knowing tat i had already linked my savings account to the credit card and i will not bring my atm card out!!! tat was on 20th Feb which was my pay day!!! imagine u're out alone with the money in the bank but not able to withdraw a single cent with the cancelled credit card! how pathetic!

seriously, i really do not know wat had i done wrong. i admit i am heartless as i initial the break up without any hesitation. but shouldnt i behave this way instead of dragging and dragging? i really had no more feelings towards him and my heart had already gone to another person. isnt there one sentence say "in love, there's no right or wrong?" WHAT EXACTLY DID I DONE WRONG? WHY DID MY MUM BLAMES ME INSTEAD OF PUTTING HERSELF INTO MY SHOES? WHY CAN'T SHE BE MORE UNDERSTANDING? it hurts when i see my mum cried. i dun wish to hurt her. but wat can i do to make her feel better? she had asked me to patch things up with him and pretend nothing had happened. but mum, things arent the way it is now. i cant pretend nothing had actually happened! wat's more, there is already no love between us. i just wanna let u know that i've tried all means to put on a fake smile in front of u and pretending to be strong. i need ur encouragement and understanding! i am suffering inside!!! do u know?

alright! enough of my grievances. tonight shall be a happy and enjoying night as we're celebrating yunnie's 21st bdae! will be partying at powerhouse. hope i really will enjoy and dance my heart out. so much things had be happening lately and i just felt so breathless.

- no appetite due to panbesy
- damn painful headache @ left side of my head
- backache since 2 weeks back
- nv been in a good mood